5 June, 2016
13 DISGUSTING AND DUMB FOOD PRODUCTS THAT WERE UTTER FAILURES
Sometimes what seems like a good idea just isn’t. Fortunately for most of us, we don’t invest millions upon millions of dollars on these ideas and watch that money burn with the fury of a thousand fires as it sits on grocery store shelves without so much of a glance from prospective buyers.
This is exactly what happened with the following 18 products. Whether they were labelled and/or translated hilariously wrong, or it was just a disgusting idea to begin with, the following food products were total failures on inception.
1. Heinz EZ Squirt
Everybody likes ketchup. It is arguably the most popular of condiments. Hoping to reap additional profit with a little bit of innovation, Heinz decided to release colored ketchups in blue, green and purple. The result? Food that looked revolting. I once put green ketchup in macaroni and cheese and couldn’t even touch it after that.
2. Orbitz Drinks
While pretty to look at (many referred to its appearance as a lava lamp), the beverage didn’t taste great, and the edible orbs within the drink made many feel like they were downing backwash. In case it wasn’t obvious, the latter wasn’t an attractive quality.
3. Pepsi Blue
Food and beverages aren’t blue for a reason. It’s fiercely unappealing. Going against this insight, Pepsi released Pepsi Blue, a berry-flavored soda that was way too sweet for anybody’s palate. As such, the drink didn’t last long. It was released mid 2002 and discontinued by 2004.
4. Oreo O’s
In the early 2000s audiences were introduced to a cereal that was supposed to taste like Oreos. And we were all pretty excited about it. What we ultimately discovered, however, was that the cereal just tasted like the cookie part of the Oreo, and the icing (the best part, according to everybody) was absent. Maybe if they threw some damn marshmallows into the box, we’d still see these things on shelves.
5. Coors Rocky Mountain Sparkling Water
Indeed, a beer brand released bottled water. Since Coors advertised its beer as “cold brewed with pure rocky mountain spring water,” those at Coors saw a potentially profitable opportunity when there was a significant growth in the bottled water market. The beer label on a water bottle understandably confused consumers, and the product only lasted about seven years and was canceled in 1997.
McDonald’s has failed with many of its releases — “Mighty Wings,” “McHot Dog,” “McPizza,” “McLobster,” “McSalad Shakers,” “Onion Nuggets” and so on — but none appeared more disgusting than the McSpaghetti combo, which looked like something you’d get in a recalled Lunchable.
7. Wendy’s Breakfast
Despite competing restaurants serving daily breakfasts, Wendy’s morning menu just couldn’t cut it. I’m not sure why. Best stick to your lukewarm square burgers, frosties and that cute redhead in your commercials.
8. Coca-Cola Blak
Coca-Cola Black — a beverage that had double the caffeine as a can of Coke with a coffee taste — was Coca-Cola’s unsuccessful answer to energy drinks. While all energy drinks do taste like crap, Blak was just significantly crappier.
9. Taco Bell’s Bell Beefer
Taco Bell’s advertising tells us we should “Think outside the bun” yet even they opted for the bun at one point in their history. In the 1980’s, the Bell Beefer was pulled from the menu due to the fact that the sandwich was a complete mess — both financially and physically.
Consumers complained the sandwich would fall apart as soon as they could get their hands on it. However, it’s rumored there are still some dedicated fans who’ve created groups on social media to bring the flimsy sandwich back.
10. Taco Bell Lunchables
All lunchables are disgusting. This is fact. But taking a fast food chain whose food quality is notoriously questionable and teaming up with another is just a really bad idea. The result was a Taco Bell branded D.I.Y taco set (which was cold, by the way), complete with chips/tortillas, what can best be described as a “beef product,” and a measly packet of red sauce. To top off this appealing ensemble, it also came with the impossible to open Capri Sun.
11. Crystal Pepsi
Damn, Pepsi, you guys messed up a lot. Crystal Pepsi — released in the early ’90s — was your average Pepsi, but clear. This stupid idea confused any and all prospective buyers. As a result of this mysterious beverage, Pepsi lost hundreds of millions courtesy of this failed marketing strategy, according to Forbes.
12. Doritos 3D’s
During the mid-2000s, Doritos released a product that was essentially a Dorito in 3D, so the product was aptly named to say the least. The problem was, the product took up more space in the bag and wasn’t really all that different from the original. Plus, it had limited flavors, especially compared to the original Doritos we’ve grown to love. I personally liked these a lot, but the general public did not.
13. New Coke
During the infamous “cola wars” of 1985 (this is sarcasm, by the way) the people behind Coke foolishly decided to replace the original formula of their famous soft drink as a means of competing in the market, calling it “New Coke.” The public reacted very negatively toward this change; things got hostile. As such, within three months of the release of “New Coke,” Coke reintroduced their original formula, calling it “Coca-Cola Classic.” Huge fail.